1. Rabbits Who Think They Are Uptight Schoolteachers
Rabbits
who think they are uptight schoolteachers can be found throughout the
northern United States. They are distinguishable by their delicate
purple sweater vests and their prim, disapproving facial expressions. If
you find one, be sure to tuck in your shirt.
2. Bears Who Think They Are Hailing A Cab
Bears who
think they are hailing a cab are common in areas with poor or limited
public transportation. They are harmless to most humans except cab
drivers.
3. Huskies Who Think They Are Intellectuals
Huskies
who think they are intellectuals are most commonly seen in quiet reading
rooms or alcoves with their furry little noses buried in a book. Once
they reach adulthood most huskies who think they are intellectuals begin
working on an obscure doctoral thesis that they will tragically never
finish to their satisfaction.
4. Bears Who Think They Are At Some Kind Of A Picnic
Bears
who think they are at some kind of a picnic can be found wherever there
are picnic tables, waiting patiently for potato salad and cold quiche.
5. Cats Who Think They Are Reckless Drivers
If you see
a cat who thinks he is a reckless driver, pull over to the side of the
road and alert the local veterinary traffic police.
6. Teacup Pigs Who Think They Are At Prep School
Mostly
native to New England and surrounding areas, teacup pigs who think they
are at prep school are known for their delicate little snouts and their
elitist attitudes.
7. Cats Who Think They Are British Schoolboys From The '50s
This one is called Reginald.
8. Cats Who Think They Are Couch Potatoes
Most felines
in North America think that they are couch potatoes, but not all of
them have such a remarkable affinity for Lifetime Original Movies and
Court TV.
9. Dogs Who Think They Are Your Secretary
Their air of
competence and official demeanor makes these dogs fit in very naturally
in an office setting, but they cannot usually be trusted with things
like "tasks" or "work."
10. Foxes Who Think They Are At An Amusement Park
Foxes who think they are at an amusement park are very concerned about your work/life balance.
11. Cats Who Think They Are At A Drive-Thru
These felines are primarily distinguishable by their persistent ordering style and their indifference to condiments.
12. Polar Bears Who Think They Are Waving Goodbye
Something
of a tragic animal, polar bears who think they are waving goodbye are
forever in a state of flux. In a very real sense, they are achingly
aware of the passing of all things. You should definitely wave back at
them.
13. Cats Who Think They Have Seen A Ghost
Cats who think they have seen a ghost are by nature superstitious animals, but they also have a direct line to the other side, so they should be taken very seriously indeed.
14. Dogs Who Think They Are, Like, Super Chill Bros
Dogs who think they are, like, super chill bros should be approached with caution and, for good measure, a six pack.
15. Rats Who Think They Are Early 19th Century Housewives
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single rodent in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.
16. Chinchillas Who Think They Are At A Birthday Party
The
distinguishing characteristics of these crepuscular rodents, of the
family Chinchillidae, is that the little hats they wear are simply too
precious for words.
17. Cats Who Think They Are Going For An Afternoon Stroll
Mostly native to the British Isles, these cats are generally domestic shorthairs and their strolls are generally post-prandial.
18. Owls Who Think They Are Picnicking In The Rain
Owls who think they are picnicking in the rain also think that they are hilarious.
19. Cats Who Think They Are Extremely Disappointed In You
For
as long as these animals have been known, naturalists have been at a
loss to explain the scientific reasons behind their severe facial
expressions and implacable body language. The prevailing theory is that
these idiosyncratic physical features are a result of the fact that you
have let them down for the last time.
20. Cats Who Think They Are At Some Kind Of A Holiday Camp
While
all domesticated cats think, on one level, that they are at some kind
of a holiday camp, this sub-species is determined to damn-well make the
most of it.
21. Cats Who Think They Are Getting Dressed For Work
Cats
who think they are getting dressed for work can generally be found
listening halfheartedly to morning radio and promising themselves that
they are going to start going to bed earlier in future.
22. Squirrels Who Think They Are Having A Nice Day At The Beach
Most
people don't know that squirrels are rodents and that these squirrels
in particular are rodents with a very strong relaxation drive.
23. Cats Who Think They Are Angrily Demanding Service At A Restaurant
These felines are known for their sharp retractable claws and their paltry, insulting tips.
24. Bulldogs Who Think They Are Barflies
These
domestic dogs are distinguished by the thick folds of skin on their
brows, which are the result of worrying about whether they should have
ordered that third pint on a school night.
25. Cats Who Think They Are Extremely Successful Businessmen
Only about 1% of cats fall into this category.
